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...babylon 5 humor by karen...

YOU KNOW YOU GO TO NAZARETH AND WATCH TOO MUCH BABYLON FIVE IF:

...You begin to seriously wonder if Dr. Edelman is really a Vorlon without his encounter suit.
 
...You are convinced Aron at Marriott is now serving spoo sandwiches.
 
...You hope that the new dorm will be named "Lyons North," because the other name might spark galactic controversy.
 
...You direct a lost guy at the canal looking for the Thruway to take the Pittsford jumpgate.
 
...You answer your dorm phone "C&C."
 
...You name your '90 Stanza "The White Star."
 
...You ask if anyone wants to go hang out at "Narns and Noble" with you this weekend.
 
...You call for the Rush Act when your cleaning lady doesn't replace the paper towels in the kitchen when they've been out for three or four days.
 
...You answer, "8:30 class? Ha! When I was being trained by Jesuits..."
 
...When your friend talks about how class was cancelled, you murmur, "No boom *today.* Boom tomorrow. Always, boom tomorrow..."

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD? ...these are original. 'Cept for Delenn's.

Sheridan: I'm sorry the chicken crossed the road. And I'm sorry I waited so long to blow it straight to hell. Woo-hoo!
 
Delenn: We are grey. We stand between the chicken and the road.
 
Sinclair: I am authorized to let the chicken across the road by any means necessary. I have authority in this sector.
 
Morden: What does the chicken want?
 
Londo: To reclaim the good old days of the Republic.
 
Lennier: Because it was following Delenn to the ends of the galaxy and beyond.
 
Draal: Because it understood the Third Principle of Sentient Life: the capacity to sacrifice oneself for a friend, a cause, or a loved one. Mmm, chicken...
 
Ivanova: Boom!
 
Garibaldi: Lousy chickens...
 
Talia: The last time I scanned a chicken, it was horrible.
 
Lyta: You can't harm me. You can't harm one who has been touched by chickens.

BABYLON 5 FILK (filking, of course, being song parodies. These aren't written by me. They just made me laugh my head off. Ultra-singable. Someday, I'll have mine up here, 'til then, it's my senior thesis I'm worried about)
 
I Wonder What That Narn Is Doing With Her by Melissa Rathmell, to the tune of "I Wonder What the King is Doing Tonight" from Camelot
 
Babylon 5 (Garibaldi's Song) by Roger Aradi, to the tune of REM's Man on the Moon
 
The Captain, by T Arnold and Robin Baylor, to the tune of "The Boxer" by Simon and Garfunkel.
 
The Last Of The Babylon Stations by Jonathan Andrew Sheen, to the tune of "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" by Gordon Lightfoot.
 
Five Years by Tom Smith, to the tune of "One Week" by the Barenaked Ladies. Don't read it if you're actually watching the show, 'cause it's Spoiler City.
 
Vorlons, Guns and Money by Andrew Costa. To the tune of "Lawyers, Guns and Money" by Warren Zevon.
 
Babylon Fif. To the "tune" of "Beowulf." By Kevin Wald. This is a must-see for any English major out there. I was laughing for hours... literal hours...